tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-27523880976965459562024-03-06T03:29:27.698+08:00CeRITaKu....HikarIhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08835599799986195450noreply@blogger.comBlogger178125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2752388097696545956.post-16540056726027113172015-11-03T23:12:00.001+08:002015-11-03T23:12:32.849+08:00Looking backLooking back, reading my previous entries, I wonder if I wrote them, because I could barely handle the cheesiness and awkwardness Im having at the moment. LOL....<br />
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<br />HikarIhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08835599799986195450noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2752388097696545956.post-79120259564422347422015-07-13T17:21:00.000+08:002015-11-03T23:08:39.186+08:00You've got to do what you gotta do... I learnt this the hard way, that there is never the right time. So often when taking a step for something, we wait for the right time. But how did we know that now isnt? What makes us think that we will have the chance to do what we want to do when we deem it fit? Yes, when I made the mistake for the first time I thought thats okay, Ill probably have the chance next time. I forgot that there is no next time because nobody can see the future. No one can predict the future. So when I lost the chance again, for the second time *I tell you, Im not proud of it* it hits me pretty hard.<br />
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Because you never know what the future holds, you never know what you might lose when youre so busy taking your chance and time, its better to get hurt now after you've done your best in the present rather than losing your only chance forever and regretting what couldve happened if youre taking the first step.<br />
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Theres no use crying over the spilled milk but until I can forgive myself, I think there will be times when I will post things like this. And if its bothering you, please forgive me and ignore me. Right now I just need some time to organize my thoughts, and hopefully I can come back as a strong and wise woman.<br />
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<br />HikarIhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08835599799986195450noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2752388097696545956.post-74125677888342481182015-07-11T21:04:00.000+08:002015-11-03T23:08:51.180+08:00Andai itu takdirnyaI want to tell you a story, and please pardon my English.<br />
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This is a story about a girl that had a crush on her senior for a long time. She met this guy, her senior in the new school when she got transferred there. Its not love at the first sight but as time passed, she learnt that he was kind of guy she wanted as a husband. She did made her first move and they became friends, but due to her insecurities, she immaturely ended their relationship. As they lost contact, she regretted her decision and she kept praying that one day she will meet him again. It turned out, they met again as they studied in a same university and coincidentally both of them joined the program their university organized. She had the chance to see how much time had changed him to a better person, and realized that she fell for the same guy again. After that day, she tried to keep her distance as she didnt want to repeat the same mistakes she did when they were in school so she had been watching him from a far. She also didnt want to be so forward, because she afraid she might get rejected. She realized it wont get any better if she let things passed without doing something to change it so she had been preparing herself to try for a confession. She never thought she would lost her chance forever when one day she received a news that he had passed away. He had returned to his Creator, and she knew that now she wont be able to see him again anymore.<br />
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She prepared herself that he might marry someone else, but to lose him that way? She knew she had to accept it. She prayed that he would have peace there, and hoping one day her broken heart could be healed because she had been liking him for a very long time.<br />
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P/S: Al-Fatihah for him.<br />
P/S: I know it sounds cheesy but oh well...HikarIhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08835599799986195450noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2752388097696545956.post-9896209171970111072015-07-10T17:58:00.000+08:002015-07-10T17:58:19.174+08:00Pergi tak kembaliSebelum subuh semalam, mendapat perkhabaran yang dia kini telah kembali kepada PenciptaNya.<br />
Al-Fatihah.<br />
Semoga rohnya tenang di sana.<br />
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<br />HikarIhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08835599799986195450noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2752388097696545956.post-81296522751547129272015-06-25T23:35:00.000+08:002015-06-25T23:35:36.641+08:00Personality test...againAssalamualaikum.<br />
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Godek-godek previous posts, terjumpa personality tests yang aku pernah buat once upon a time. So I retook the test, dan result dia macam di bawah. In conclusion, x ada beza pun. Ada perubahan pada one or two parts, but mostly consistent. So, here goes nothing ^^<br />
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<h3 style="background-color: white; color: #999966; font-family: Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif;">
Get to know yourself better</h3>
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<b>Your view on yourself:</b><br />
<span id="Label1">You are down-to-earth and people like you because you are so straightforward. You are an efficient problem solver because you will listen to both sides of an argument before making a decision that usually appeals to both parties.</span><b>The type of girlfriend/boyfriend you are looking for:</b><br />
<span id="Label2">You like serious, smart and determined people. You don't judge a book by its cover, so good-looking people aren't necessarily your style. This makes you an attractive person in many people's eyes.</span><b>Your readiness to commit to a relationship:</b><br />
<span id="Label3">You are ready to commit as soon as you meet the right person. And you believe you will pretty much know as soon as you might that person.</span><b>The seriousness of your love:</b><br />
<span id="Label4">You like to flirt and behave seductively. The opposite sex finds this very attractive, and that's why you'll always have admirers hanging off your arms. But how serious are you about choosing someone to be in a relationship with?</span><b>Your views on education</b><br />
<span id="Label5">Education is very important in life. You want to study hard and learn as much as you can.</span><b>The right job for you:</b><br />
<span id="Label6">You're a practical person and will choose a secure job with a steady income. Knowing what you like to do is important. Find a regular job doing just that and you'll be set for life.</span><b>How do you view success:</b><br />
<span id="Label7">You are afraid of failure and scared to have a go at the career you would like to have in case you don't succeed. Don't give up when you haven't yet even started! Be courageous.</span><b>What are you most afraid of:</b><br />
<span id="Label8">You are afraid of having no one to rely on in times of trouble. You don't ever want to be unable to take care of yourself. Independence is important to you.</span><b>Who is your true self:</b><br />
<span id="Label9">You are full of energy and confidence. You are unpredictable, with moods changing as quickly as an ocean. You might occasionally be calm and still, but never for long.</span></div>
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Hee....this is just for fun but I admit there are certain parts yang do mirror my thoughts. What are they? I wont tell ya ;p Tapi ada juga parts yang sebenarnya tidak melambangkan diri aku yang sebenarnya....I think so....</div>
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Kalau nak try, boleh try link <a href="http://www.quizbox.com/personality/test82.aspx">ini</a>. Douzo~~~</div>
HikarIhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08835599799986195450noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2752388097696545956.post-39511241240811037302015-01-08T08:59:00.001+08:002015-01-08T08:59:56.341+08:00Future<div style="text-align: justify;">
Assalamualaikum...</div>
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Its been a while...ingat nak biar blog ni berkulat je....but apparently Im coming back here ^^</div>
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Now that it seems like my life is finally in order, or so I thought, maka....boleh la nak update di sini.</div>
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Alhamdulillah, Im finally done with MSc viva...well, with correction, of course. But thats okay, its not like I expected everything to be perfect, at least with little time given I finally have a chance to think about my future. To seriously think about it, not just wishing and dreaming how my future gonna be....</div>
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But....it is a scary process. To make decision on what you are about to do. Sometimes I wonder can I just stay at home and be my parents assistant instead? hahahaha....</div>
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So....have you heard a poem entitled "The Road Not Taken" written by Robert Frost? </div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: x-small;">The Road Not Taken</span></h1>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: x-small;"><span class="author" style="background-color: white; color: #4d493f; display: inline-block; letter-spacing: 0.05em; text-transform: uppercase;">BY <a href="http://www.poetryfoundation.org/bio/robert-frost" style="color: #043d6e; outline: none; text-decoration: none;">ROBERT FROST</a></span><span style="background-color: white;"></span><span style="background-color: white;"></span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: x-small;">Two roads diverged in a yellow wood,</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: x-small;">And sorry I could not travel both</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: x-small;">And be one traveler, long I stood</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: x-small;">And looked down one as far as I could</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: x-small;">To where it bent in the undergrowth;</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: x-small;">Then took the other, as just as fair,</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: x-small;">And having perhaps the better claim,</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: x-small;">Because it was grassy and wanted wear;</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: x-small;">Though as for that the passing there</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: x-small;">Had worn them really about the same,</span></div>
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: x-small;"><br /></span><div style="padding-left: 1em; text-indent: -1em;">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: x-small;">And both that morning equally lay</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: x-small;">In leaves no step had trodden black.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: x-small;">Oh, I kept the first for another day!</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: x-small;">Yet knowing how way leads on to way,</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: x-small;">I doubted if I should ever come back.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: x-small;">I shall be telling this with a sigh</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: x-small;">Somewhere ages and ages hence:</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: x-small;">Two roads diverged in a wood, and I—</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: x-small;">I took the one less traveled by,</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: x-small;">And that has made all the difference.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: x-small;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="color: black; line-height: normal; text-indent: 0px;">Poem ni aku copy-paste dari <a href="http://www.poetryfoundation.org/poem/173536">sini</a></span></div>
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<span style="color: black; line-height: normal; text-indent: 0px;">Analysis of this poem can be googled....and since Im not going to analyse it (pardon me, since it is not my forte), and all I wanna say is....the poem, or at least the first half of it, represents what Im currently has to deal. But....I dont know which road should I take and it is so frustrating because youre....scared....of what the future might hold! Both paths have its risks and uncertainties, and more importantly, you dont wanna regret with what you have chosen later.</span></div>
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<span style="color: black; line-height: normal; text-indent: 0px;">p/s: Well....for now....I just do the correction first, decision later. Huhuhu ;p</span></div>
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HikarIhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08835599799986195450noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2752388097696545956.post-36279468200483470002014-06-20T05:19:00.000+08:002014-06-20T05:19:04.019+08:00Reality vs DreamPeople's expectation vs your dream.<br />
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Choose.<br />
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What are you supposed to do when everyone around you expect you to stay on the path that has been laid for you?.....before you finally realized that it is not something you want to do in the future, but something else.<br />
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And that 'something else' is not what everyone expect you to do, because it is full with hardships and obstacles and difficulties (and not as glamorous as what you are currently doing). But....it is what you finally realized what you have been missing all along. A dream.<br />
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Meanwhile, the road that has been laid for you, is already there, with less hardships and obstacles and difficulties and also glamorous (according to what everyone around you said). But...it is not what you want to do for your whole life.<br />
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And again, is everything that you've been asking yourself, a dream and also a reality, is it really a dilemma or is it actually just a mind trick to make you confused?<br />
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p/s: Being a rebellious at this age? pfffttt.....riddddiculousHikarIhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08835599799986195450noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2752388097696545956.post-4456155611716702772013-08-17T15:38:00.000+08:002013-08-17T15:38:45.261+08:00siblingsI am worried. What is the future for our family, especially when abah and mama are going for Hajj for 45 days? 45 days without them nearby, the future seems black.<div>
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I know they are always fighting, cannot getting along although they are siblings by blood (not that we have others, nauzubillah), I always thought fighting is good because somehow fighting strengthen the bonds between sibling (I think so), but there are limits for everything. Too much fighting between siblings might ruin your family relationships. </div>
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But lately, they have been fighting and it has a murderous feeling in their eyes. Like I dont need you and I hope you will be vanished from this world feeling. Or am I too sensitive? Its not like I havent done that. Well, when we were younger we always fought with each other, when it turned bad, mama gave us knives, so that we could kill each other and well....since we are pretty much alive, its a good method to stop a fight.</div>
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I have been worried not because they always fight with each other, I get that, two of them are always at odd with each other and I know they actually can get along with each other well, but I am worried because it has gotten bad especially lately and I think its going to get worse soon when abah and mama are not around. I honestly dont know what I am supposed to do. As the eldest of the siblings, I should find a way to deal with their temperament and stubbornness but I dont know anything. Maybe I should do what my mom did back then? Give them knives and they can kill each other and I dont care about that? Maybe its a good idea except it might have a backlash? They might kill each other for real.....and worse, I MIGHT KILL THEM MYSELF! </div>
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45 days without your parents, it sounds scary when I think about that at this current situation. I am not sure if I can do a good job looking after my brothers and sisters while they are away. I hope everything will be OK, and please spare me with their arguments. I just want to help my parents and I really dont have time to deal with their stubbornness.</div>
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p/s: Can I lock them somewhere instead? Just kidding ;P</div>
HikarIhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08835599799986195450noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2752388097696545956.post-78921268565668819342013-07-17T05:26:00.000+08:002013-07-17T05:26:18.979+08:00Korean drama-Dong YiAssalamualaikum<br />
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Last two weeks, I managed to watch 60 episodes of Saeguk drama (history-based drama), despite all stuffs with writing thesis...hehehe....Tambahan, with 60 freaking hours to complete....erghhh.....<br />
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Kalau nak tahu pasal cerita ni, silalah google atau tengok sendiri.<a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dong_Yi_(TV_series)">Wiki Dong Yi (TV Series)</a><br />
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Drama ni basically berdasarkan real life figure Concubine Choi Dong Yi, salah seorang isteri King Sukjong (pemerintah yang ke-19) pada Joseon Dynasty. Casted by Han Hyo Joo (Choi Dong Yi), Ji Jin Hee (King Sukjong) dan lain2.<br />
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Honestly, untuk habiskan 60 episodes dalam masa 3 hari bukan senang, kalau tak kerana aku banyak lompat. Part2 boring macam perbincangan politik antara King Sukjong dan menteri2 aku banyak skip. At least daripada 60 minutes dapat kurang kepada 30 minutes. Hehe....<br />
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Aku tak nak cerita pasal jalan cerita, boleh google je....just nak comment sedikit pasal drama ni. Firstly, disebabkan cerita inilah Im turning into Saeguk lover. Before Dong Yi, pernah tengok Sungkyukwan Scandal, Rooftop Prince dan Princess Man, tapi tengok je, part history buat tak kisah. Tapi lepas tengok Dong Yi, memang habis-habisan google pasal <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sukjong_of_Joseon">King Sukjong serta isteri2</a>. Secondly, lagu yang sangat syahdu. Walking in a dreamy road by Jang Nara. Somehow her voice fits perfectly, with sorrowful melody and lyrics, it just PERFECT! Thirdly, costume serta istana yang cantik!<br />
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Finally, of course our main pairing, King Sukjong and Dong Yi. Despite her status as a slave, King Sukjong cant help but to fall in love with a very hardworking and honest girl like Dong Yi and also offer her to become a Queen. Or so what the drama showed. Did I mentioned, I had withdrawal syndrome? A syndrome where you cannot get over something and in my case, its Dong Yi. Its been two weeks, and I keep playing the OST and I did watched some scenes from the drama. Not to mention I read all recaps, wikipedia or anything about Dong Yi, fictional and real life. *sigh* I guess I can graduate with thesis entitled "Korean History, Dong Yi: Truth or Fictional?"<br />
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This curiosity of mine, made me read everything I can read about them (Dong Yi, King Sukjong, queens and concubines). The more I read the more frustrated I become. Dalam drama ni, Dong Yi digambarkan sebagai seorang wanita yang paling disayangi oleh King Sukjong, of course after King Sukjong realized Jang Hui Bin's ambitions and greed (King Sukjong's another concubine). Dong Yi even refused to become a queen for the sake of the Crown Prince (Jang Hui Bin's son) and Prince Yeon Ing (Dong Yi's son). Tapi most blogs mentioned yang King Sukjong had another concubine after Dong Yi, and he even evicted Dong Yi out of palace although no reason recorded in history (not sure kalau ada). This frustration came from the fact that King Sukjong doesnt love Dong Yi the way he showed in the drama. Of course drama is drama, what did you expect from something that human create and a twist of history? But still.....I kinda get hooked up with Ji Jin Hee's character as King Sukjong. His love towards Dong Yi is or was so great that he even suggested to run away with Dong Yi because everyone around him cannot accept Dong Yi as she came from a slave status. Thats why history and drama shouldnt be mixed. A crazy drama lover like me, cannot accept the reality. *sighs*<br />
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And now here I am, cannot accept anything yet cannot get over with it...<br />
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I guess if you want to know the truth you have to summon the death, LOL....<br />
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Nak sangat tahu kenapa King Sukjong ada concubine lain selain Dong Yi. Nak sangat tahu kenapa Dong Yi diperintah keluar istana sedangkan at that time concubine kena tinggal dalam istana, kecuali selepas King mati. Nak sangat tahu betul ke Prince Yeon Ing bukanlah anak kesayangan King Sukjong, tidak seperti yang digambarkan dalam drama?<br />
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Everything feels so frustrated since dalam drama, the best moments bila Dong Yi ada dengan King Sukjong. Eventhough they are just talking or walking or solving cases, everything seems so heartwarming, sweet. Then bila read those posts (which I dont know if its the truth or not), but still.....rasa kecewa. Maybe I expect too much from King Sukjong? hahaha.....<br />
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Well, hopefully I can recover from this withdrawal syndrome soon, or else Im gonna be a shut in forever. LOL. Drama, drama jugak. Writing tetap kena teruskan *sigh*<br />
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p/s: bila writing, tengok WORDS 5 minutes, lagha 5 jam. Bila nak siap?<br />
Maybe I should change major? Korean history anyone?HikarIhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08835599799986195450noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2752388097696545956.post-67607375490960500622013-04-02T10:47:00.000+08:002013-04-02T10:47:47.296+08:00making decisionsAssalamualaikum...<br />
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Lately, actually not lately la. Its been a few years already, everytime I had to make a decision (let say, something for the future), after so much considerations, when I thought it was the best for me, there always some kind of thought or whisper or hunch or whatsoever, saying that "I know Im gonna regret my decision, but it was for the best". Everytime I am making decisions, that sentences keep popping inside my head.<br />
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Oh what to do......<br />
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p/s: Lack of courage perhaps?HikarIhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08835599799986195450noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2752388097696545956.post-79739889541277052302013-01-20T18:24:00.000+08:002013-01-20T18:24:19.086+08:00yang hilang.....Assalamualaikum<br />
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Masa tengah tengok Detective Conan The Movie 15:Quarter of Silence, terperasan satu character ni, pakai badge "SP". Peminat Jdorama macam aku mesti perasan "SP" ni apa. SP ni ialah Security Police, ala-ala bodyguard kepada VVIP. So bila ternampak pasal SP tu, teringat pasal harddisk yang ada drama SP lakonan Okada Junichi. nak tahu pasal cerita tu silalah google ea. Yang pasti, cerita ni penuh dengan action and Okada Junnichi mecha kakkoii ^^<br />
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Berbalik kepada harddisk tadi, tak silap awal tahun lepas, 500GB harddisk aku masuk virus dan tak dapat diselamatkan. Maka hilanglah segala treasures yang selama ni aku kumpul, especially yang paling aku sayang, JDrama. Ni disebabkan dekat kolej tak ramai peminat jdrama, kpop ramai la. So sumber jdrama memang sangat terhad.<br />
<br />
Antara jdrama yang hilang, yang aku sangat suka ulang tengok termasuklah;<br />
1) Security Police (SP)<br />
2) Tantei Gakuen Q<br />
3) Liar Game (Season 1, 2, movie)<br />
4) Detective Conan live adaptation<br />
5) Yasuko to Kenji<br />
6) Atashinchi no danshi<br />
7) Iryu<br />
8) Risou no musuko<br />
9) Bloody Monday<br />
10) Hayami-san to yobareru hi (yang ni x sampai seminggu download)<br />
11) Zettai Kareshi<br />
12) Hana yori dango<br />
13) dan banyak lagi sampai dah tak ingat, termasuklah anime<br />
<br />
Sebahagian portion HD aku ada kpop nyer stuff macam Running Man, Family Outing, We Got Married season 1 pastu a few dramas. Yang lain x berapa sedih hilang sebab ada banyak sumber except We Got Married season 1. Itu memang rare kalau orang ada. Sayangnya sampai sekarang aku x jumpa orang yang ada WGM season 1.<br />
<br />
Of course, the greatest regret sebab hilang jdrama. Almost 2 tahun kumpul, HD dah hampir penuh, dalam sekelip mata ia hilang. Tapi, x pelah, redha je la. Mungkin ada lah hikmahnya yang aku x nampak.<br />
<br />
Walau apapun, aku masih berusaha kumpul balik cerita-cerita yang aku ada since kadang-kadang aku suka tengok balik, especially kalau action....hehehe.....<br />
<br />
p/s: Kena beli HD baru, satu HD untuk daijina JDrama, satu lagi untuk Kdrama =DHikarIhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08835599799986195450noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2752388097696545956.post-85948070916487936932013-01-18T18:41:00.000+08:002013-01-18T18:41:16.696+08:00suka sukiLast time aku pernah buat <a href="http://nursakura.blogspot.com/2012/09/saje-suka-suka.html">personality test</a> ni. So this time aku buat balik, somehow banyak yang dah berubah.<br />
<br />
Here....<br />
<br />
<br />
<i><b>Your view on yourself:</b></i><br />
<i><br /></i>
<i>Other people find you very interesting, but you are really hiding your true self. Your friends love you because you are a good listener. They'll probably still love you if you learn to be yourself with them.</i><br />
<i><br /></i>
<i><b>The type of girlfriend/boyfriend you are looking for:</b></i><br />
<i><br /></i>
<i>You like serious, smart and determined people. You don't judge a book by its cover, so good-looking people aren't necessarily your style. This makes you an attractive person in many people's eyes.</i><br />
<i><br /></i>
<i><b>Your readiness to commit to a relationship:</b></i><br />
<i><br /></i>
<i>You are ready to commit as soon as you meet the right person. And you believe you will pretty much know as soon as you might that person.</i><br />
<i><br /></i>
<i><b>The seriousness of your love:</b></i><br />
<i><br /></i>
<i>You like to flirt and behave seductively. The opposite sex finds this very attractive, and that's why you'll always have admirers hanging off your arms. But how serious are you about choosing someone to be in a relationship with?</i><br />
<i><br /></i>
<i><b>Your views on education</b></i><br />
<i><br /></i>
<i>Education is very important in life. You want to study hard and learn as much as you can.</i><br />
<i><br /></i>
<i><b>The right job for you:</b></i><br />
<i><br /></i>
<i>You're a practical person and will choose a secure job with a steady income. Knowing what you like to do is important. Find a regular job doing just that and you'll be set for life.</i><br />
<i><br /></i>
<i><b>How do you view success:</b></i><br />
<i><br /></i>
<i>You are afraid of failure and scared to have a go at the career you would like to have in case you don't succeed. Don't give up when you haven't yet even started! Be courageous.</i><br />
<i><br /></i>
<i><b>What are you most afraid of:</b></i><br />
<i><br /></i>
<i>You are afraid of things that you cannot control. Sometimes you show your anger to cover up how you feel.</i><br />
<i><br /></i>
<i><b>Who is your true self:</b></i><br />
<i><br /></i>
<i>You are full of energy and confidence. You are unpredictable, with moods changing as quickly as an ocean. You might occasionally be calm and still, but never for long.</i><br />
<br />
p/s: this is just for fun ^^ boleh try buat kat <a href="http://www.quizbox.com/personality/test82.aspx">sini</a><br />
dan.....ada yang x betul pun<br />
HikarIhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08835599799986195450noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2752388097696545956.post-72321639865600508442013-01-18T18:23:00.000+08:002013-01-18T18:23:05.506+08:00exaggerate is my middle name ;PAssalamualaikum<br />
<br />
Petang tadi baru selesai diskus data dengan Prof dan Dr (both are my supervisors-and they are husband and wife). Everytime Dr (my main sv) cakap Prof ada sama, rasa takut nak jumpa datang. EVERYTIME! No kidding! Prof bagi aura orang serius, and of course I respect him a lot since dia expert dalam polymer ni.<br />
<br />
Supposedly petang tadi aku kena present slide untuk coming conference kat Penang, but aku bagitahu Dr boleh postpone presentation x, sebab kalau boleh hari ni nak discuss data yang aku baru siapkan. Dr said OK and dia cakap if petang ni ada masa kita present terus je la.<br />
<br />
So bermulala episode meroyanku. Dalam masa dua hari ni, aku stay aje kat bilik, siapkan calculations bagai, siapkan slide sambil baca balik journals yang dah lama x baca. Hehehe....Masa tengah buat slide, aku plotla graph nak tengok pattern....suprisingly graph aku x ada pattern! kejap naik, pastu turun, pastu naik balik! apa jadi?!!! Dengan perasaan yang cemas, gelabah dan panik, apa lagi, habis semua journals dibelek, tengok kalau previous researchers dapat pattern pelik macam aku. Of course, memang x ada! Im the only one with the weird data.<br />
<br />
Jadi dalam masa dua hari ni, memang kerja aku cari reasons kenapa aku x dapat result yang diharapkan. Faham-faham aje la, its impossible. Dalam journal semua nak cantik. Rasa stress, serabut semua benda negatif start menggoda aku. Macam-macam dah fikir. "im not a good student la", "mesti prof dengan dr kecewa dengan akula", "im not suited to do researchla" dan banyak lagi yang x dapat nak ditulis. Siap meroyan kat twitter! Aku ada dua twitter acc, dua2 meroyan kat situ. even dekat fandom *sighs*<br />
<br />
Then Dr message cakap meeting postpone pukul 4 (kitaorang sepatutnya jumpa at 3). Bayangkan, aku dahla resah, x tenang jiwa, pastu Dr message kena tunda lagi sejam! Oh MY! Im going craaayyyyyzeeee......Rasa kepala nak meletop dengan pelbagai assumptions!<br />
<br />
Then, sampai pada masa yang dijanjikan, Prof tengok data, the prof agak hairan kenapa data aku pelik. Bak kata orang, "tergerak hati" nak sebut "dua data ni menggunakan method yang berbeza". Allah gerakkan hati aku untuk explain! Pastu Prof dengan muka yang....ummm.....faham(?)....Prof sebut "I see.....Patutla". At that moment aku rasa burden aku dah terbang melayang-melayang. No more negative assumptions semua! Oh thank you Allah!<br />
<br />
Seriously before ni aku tak terfikir langsung, pasal aku compilekan sekali data yang menggunakan method yang berbeza. Actually aku nak buat comparison, tapi since the first method tak siap sepenuhnya lagi, dan aku terus sekalikan kedua-dua data, tu yang jadi weird. huhuhuhu......my bad! And lastly discussion kami ended smoothly. Dan aku balik dengan hati yang gembira.<br />
<br />
Aigoo~~~<br />
<br />
Masa driving tadi, tiba-tiba terasa macam, walaupun kecil tapi aku rasa gembira! rasa macam dah lama x segembira macam ni.<br />
<br />
Apa-apa pun, lets keep fighting! Lagi dua minggu nak present dekat Penang! x boleh berjimba sangat! Ganbatte!<br />
<br />
p/s: I need a rest!HikarIhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08835599799986195450noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2752388097696545956.post-42228764494224639422013-01-15T08:37:00.000+08:002013-01-15T08:37:43.842+08:00small reunionAssalamualaikum ^^<br />
<br />
Hari Sabtu yg lepas, tanpa dirancang aku dapat jumpa salah seorang my closest friend dekat MRSMKT dulu, Ain. Actually, ianya berlaku secara kebetulan, bila aku ternampak tweet Ain yang mengatakan dia berada di Skudai, sambil jalan2 dekat USS. So lepas exchange few tweets, kitaorang decided nak jumpa. After I picked up Ain dekat kolej, kitaorang decided nak lepak dekat Meranti je since dia da makan, and aku pun still kenyang lagi.<br />
<br />
Bila da berjumpa, macam-macam la yang kitaorang borakkan. Daripada nama cikgu sampailah kepada hal ehwal semasa. Yang kelakarnya, honestly kitaorang da tak berapa ingat nama cikgu-cikgu. Memang struggle jugakla malam tu kasik ingat. Hehehe....<br />
<br />
Seronok sebenarnya jumpa kawan yang dah lima tahun tak bertemu. LIMA TAHUN! wow!!! Last time jumpa ambil result spm, tapi kejap sangat. Lepas tu masing-masing bawak hal sendiri. Bila dah jumpa Ain, rasa rindu dekat kawan-kawan makin membuak-membuak.<br />
<br />
Teringat masa dekat MRSMKT, kitaorang dulu bertujuh. Me, Ain, Intan, Elly, Una, Mia and Amani. Kitaorang selalu lepak sama-sama, makan sama-sama. Kesimpulannya bersama-samalah. Segala benda kitaorang share, even sape crush kitaorang dulu. Hehe....Kalau korang nak taw, I still ingat lagi sape suka kat sape....hehehe.....<br />
<br />
After 5 years, kitaorang belum berkesempatan nak berkumpul beramai-ramai. I hope someday kita semua dapat berkumpul ramai-ramai. Buat small gathering. Mesti seronok dan happening!<br />
<br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhYGdOECkclZUlZYVe757iEt_NtdRRkwzdDCCQLsjCIOWdAHhhVm-K2SIWyaB4LAz660LYD2RcuGbOgs7pWd7NE49M3U1RzqFz9vr-NHFqGqgQ-uNHhprWw1Q23fnOj_LTr1KTKlRpMYPdh/s1600/75068_4568113875724_951917930_n.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhYGdOECkclZUlZYVe757iEt_NtdRRkwzdDCCQLsjCIOWdAHhhVm-K2SIWyaB4LAz660LYD2RcuGbOgs7pWd7NE49M3U1RzqFz9vr-NHFqGqgQ-uNHhprWw1Q23fnOj_LTr1KTKlRpMYPdh/s320/75068_4568113875724_951917930_n.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Me and Ain =D</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
p/s: Miss you friends =DHikarIhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08835599799986195450noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2752388097696545956.post-69627805248872742902013-01-11T20:56:00.000+08:002013-01-11T20:56:21.262+08:00Japan, I miss uAssalamualaikum ^^<br />
<br />
Lately, keinginan nak pergi Jepun makin membuak-buak. Sape2 yang kenal I, memang tawla I memang hardcore Jpop (please and please and please, jgn tertukar Jpop and Kpop, they are different!) hehehe....memang dah pernah jejak dekat Osaka, tapi rasa x puas. Rasa macam x explore habis, since pergi untuk university visit, bukan country visit. LOL.<br />
<br />
Tapi, semenjak tengok Rurouni Kenshin (live adaptation movie, anime, manga) perasaan tu makin membuak-buak especially sebab Rurouni Kenshin ni era samurai, rasa classic/cultural tu sangat kuat. errr......apa yang I membebel ni? im confuse @.@"<br />
<br />
Anyways, since tengok RK, rasa tarikan culture dia tu kuat. Tu yang buat I nak sangat pergi sana! So tadi after lunch menggedik bukak MAS dengan Firefly, check harga flight. Pheww.....MAS memang mahal. Tapi berbaloi naik. AirAsia murahla, almost half dari tambang MAS, tapi....um...you know la ek.<br />
<br />
But then, walaupun harga flight murah, and I nak pergi time winter since I suka sejuk, memang tengah berkira la jugak. Again.....satu kata keramat bermain dalam kepala. NO MONEY NO TALK. LOL.....yeah.....budget agak tight, dengan real life lagi, dengan fandom lagi. upps!!! so.......i might need to reconsider. Maybe kena pergi winter next year, if belom kawin la ;P<br />
<br />
Apa-apa pun, nanti bila nak pergi, I want to travel dekat rural area. If Osaka, then kawasan kampung dekat Osaka. If Tokyo, then kawasan kampung dekat Tokyo. xperlu kampung sangat, cukupla dapat tengok kawasan2 perumahan dekat situ.selalu bila tengok Jdrama, dorang buat dalam rumah, design dia quite nice and simple. Me likey ^^ And then, kalau ada duit lebih, nak jejak Kyoto! Actually this is a must! Tempat ni tempat asal Kenshin (my samurai boyfie ;p) hehehe......so nak jugak feel era samurai, around 1867 camtu. If ada la. Probably kena cari dojo mana2, kalau dorang bukak untuk public.<br />
<br />
So, start saving from now. Susah since perbelanjaan tu tinggi. Well, nak satu benda ni, kena sacrifice benda lain kan. Start dari sekarang, kena review budget, jangan spend emotionally..hohoho. And pray for me ea, so that this dream of mine akan tercapai, SOON!<br />
<br />
p/s: <strike>Kame</strike> Nippon matte yo!HikarIhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08835599799986195450noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2752388097696545956.post-51308715589393701032012-12-27T20:56:00.000+08:002012-12-27T20:56:59.495+08:00sweet sour-masa form 4Assalamualaikum<br />
<br />
Tadi, masa tengah fikir baju mana nak pakai untuk esok, tiba-tiba teringat kenangan masa tingkatan 4. Boleh dikatakan, kenangan pahit jugakla bagi manusia yang tak suka konflik macam aku.<br />
<br />
Ada satu hari, hari Rabu tak silap di mana sekolah aku (SMK Tengku Mahmud, Besut), macam biasa ada hari kokurikulum. Jadi pada hari itu, kami semua pakai baju tshirt sekolah warna merah dengan seluar slack/track hitam.<br />
<br />
Nak dijadikan cerita, aku tak suka pakai seluar track sebab nampak menggelebor *besar*. Tapi nak pakai slack, x ada. So aku pakaila cotton slack warna hitam. Dari jauh memang tak nampak macam cotton slack sebab hitam. Dah beberapa kali aku pakai, so far x kena tangkap hinggalah pada suatu hari......<br />
<br />
Masa kami tengah berbaris untuk perhimpunan, tiba-tiba cikgu disiplin sekolah *x ingat nama, tapi muka dia sampai sekarang aku ingat* sentuh seluar aku dan cakap "awak ke belakang". Ditakdirkan pada hari itu, aku didapati bersalah kerana memakai cotton slack ke sekolah. Dengan hati yang sebal, aku ke belakang, berbaris bersama-sama mereka-mereka yang terang-terang buat salah *pakai Jeans kaler biru muda pulak tu!* dan yang lain-lain. Apabila perhimpunan tamat, mereka yang selamat bergerak ke kelas sambil tertanya-tanya mengapakah kami berdiri di belakang, tidak bergerak.<br />
<br />
Apabila semua pelajar telah masuk ke kelas dan tinggal kami yang 'bersalah', cikgu disiplin datang sambil menggepal buku tebal untuk dijadikan sebagai rotan. Akibat kesalahan kami, kami disebat di tangan dengan buku yang tebal itu. Sakit memangla sakit, tetapi sakit di hati lebih parah!<br />
<br />
Selesai hukuman, aku kembali ke dalam kelas dengan hati yang saaaaaaangat sebal! Pertamanya, aku tak rasa aku buat salah. Tidak dinyatakan pemakaian cotton slack ke sekolah adalah salah. Hehe<br />
Keduanya, MALU sangat! bayangkan kalau the-so-called-crush you nampak! OMG! Mana nak letak muka!!!!<br />
<br />
So sampai sahaja ke kelas....oh lupa, hari tu kami ada test mathematic, dahla masa pertama. Hati belum settle down lagi, nak kena jawab test pulak T____T what a day. Ummmm....aku masuk ke kelas, cikgu math aku faham apa yang berlaku bertanyakan pada aku "OK ke nak jawab test". Aku angguk aje lah. Nak jawab tak OK, tak pasal2 dapat F. So, cikgu bagi kertas soalan pada aku dan aku merenung je kertas soalan tu. Kelas pada waktu tu dah senyap memandangkan dorang da start awal daripada aku.<br />
<br />
Masa aku belek kertas soalan, tiba-tiba aku rasa sebak lalu aku terus menangis! OMG!!!! aku menangis sambil menjawab soalan MATH! memang.........Xyah cakapla, baju dah basah dek aku kesat air mata.....Bukan senang nak tahan diri dari menangis, especially masa tengah jawab test! macam-macam aku fikir masa tu! Rasa marah, sedih, kecewa....SEMUA!<br />
<br />
Agak lama jugak baru aku boleh tenangkan diri. X keluar pun dari kelas. Still duduk kat seat sama sambil renung kertas masa nangis. Lepas da reda, emosi da stabil, aku terus jawab soalan. Buat aje....betul atau salah dah tak kesah =(<br />
<br />
Nak dijadikan cerita, masa result keluar, aku dapat the highest mark dalam Math! Soalan math yang aku buat dalam keadaan menangis, aku dapat the highest! Oh my......memang awesome!<br />
<br />
Hahaha....tu la antara pengalaman waktu form 4 masa sekolah tu before aku pindah MRSM Kuala Terengganu. Sebab merajuk dengan sekolah tu la aku pindah sekolah.....hahaha...just kidding. Sampai sekarang, honestly tiap kali teringat peristiwa tu, hati rasa.....sebal....kecewa....Betul ke aku buat salah masa tu? hmmm.....<br />
<br />
Benda dah 6 tahun dah, tapi still clear dalam kepala =D Tapi macam orang cakap, let bygone be bygone. Buang yang keruh ambil yang jernih.<br />
<br />
Bye~~~HikarIhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08835599799986195450noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2752388097696545956.post-69925908529694538442012-11-30T10:21:00.002+08:002012-11-30T10:21:33.260+08:00hello hello helloAssalamualaikum<br />
<br />
Bila orang tanya, "ogenki desu ka?" jawab balik "genki desu....."<br />
maksudnya "sihat x?" so jawapannya mestilah "sihat....."<br />
<br />
hehehehe.....saje mengarut dalam blog hari ni. actually tengah bosan sebab dekat lab x ada orang, dan aku berseorangan dalam lab menahan ngantuk akibat the-so-called imsomnia....hahaha....mana taknya, tengah2 tidur, teringat assignment kelas Tamadun tak buat lagi, terus bangkit dan buat apa yg mampu dulu.....haissshhhh.....kalau macam ni lah hari2, pengsan x?<br />
<br />
so wassup? cheewah....<br />
<br />
p/s: adakah kesan x cukup tidur = sakit belakang?HikarIhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08835599799986195450noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2752388097696545956.post-83399563865027245322012-10-12T10:53:00.000+08:002012-10-12T10:53:07.818+08:00later.....?Assalamualaikum....<br />
<br />
Rasa nak update, nak membebel je....tapi......<br />
<br />
Hehe....nantilah....bye =DHikarIhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08835599799986195450noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2752388097696545956.post-2016347011644917692012-09-30T22:40:00.000+08:002012-09-30T22:45:26.365+08:00saje suka-sukaAssalam.<br />
<br />
Masa aku tengah baca blog seseorang, ada post pasal personality kuiz. So aku try, and here we are^^<br />
<br />
<br />
<div style="font-family: Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif;">
<b><span style="background-color: #666666; color: white;">Your view on yourself:</span></b></div>
<span id="Label1" style="background-color: #666666; color: white; font-family: Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif;">You are down-to-earth and people like you because you are so straightforward. You are an efficient problem solver because you will listen to both sides of an argument before making a decision that usually appeals to both parties.</span><br />
<span style="background-color: #666666; color: white;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span><span style="font-family: Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif;"></span>
</span><br />
<div style="font-family: Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif;">
<b><span style="background-color: #666666; color: white;">The type of girlfriend/boyfriend you are looking for:</span></b></div>
<span id="Label2" style="background-color: #666666; color: white; font-family: Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif;">You like serious, smart and determined people. You don't judge a book by its cover, so good-looking people aren't necessarily your style. This makes you an attractive person in many people's eyes.</span><br />
<div>
<span style="background-color: #666666; color: white;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span><span style="font-family: Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif;"></span></span>
<div style="font-family: Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif;">
<b><span style="background-color: #666666; color: white;">Your readiness to commit to a relationship:</span></b></div>
<span id="Label3" style="background-color: #666666; color: white; font-family: Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif;">You prefer to get to know a person very well before deciding whether you will commit to the relationship.</span></div>
<div>
<span style="background-color: #666666; color: white;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span><span style="font-family: Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif;"></span></span>
<div style="font-family: Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif;">
<b><span style="background-color: #666666; color: white;">The seriousness of your love:</span></b></div>
<span id="Label4" style="background-color: #666666; color: white; font-family: Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif;">You like to flirt and behave seductively. The opposite sex finds this very attractive, and that's why you'll always have admirers hanging off your arms. But how serious are you about choosing someone to be in a relationship with?</span></div>
<div>
<span style="background-color: #666666; color: white;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span><span style="font-family: Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif;"></span></span>
<div style="font-family: Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif;">
<b><span style="background-color: #666666; color: white;">Your views on education</span></b></div>
<span id="Label5" style="background-color: #666666; color: white; font-family: Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Education is very important in life. You want to study hard and learn as much as you can.</span></div>
<div>
<span style="background-color: #666666; color: white;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span><span style="font-family: Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif;"></span></span>
<div style="font-family: Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif;">
<b><span style="background-color: #666666; color: white;">The right job for you:</span></b></div>
<span id="Label6" style="background-color: #666666; color: white; font-family: Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif;">You're a practical person and will choose a secure job with a steady income. Knowing what you like to do is important. Find a regular job doing just that and you'll be set for life.</span></div>
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<b><span style="background-color: #666666; color: white;">How do you view success:</span></b></div>
<span id="Label7" style="background-color: #666666; color: white; font-family: Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Success in your career is not the most important thing in life. You are content with what you have and think that being with someone you love is more than spending all of your precious time just working.</span></div>
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<span style="background-color: #666666; color: white;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span><span style="font-family: Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif;"></span></span>
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<b><span style="background-color: #666666; color: white;">What are you most afraid of:</span></b></div>
<span id="Label8" style="background-color: #666666; color: white; font-family: Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif;">You are afraid of having no one to rely on in times of trouble. You don't ever want to be unable to take care of yourself. Independence is important to you.</span></div>
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<b><span style="background-color: #666666; color: white;">Who is your true self:</span></b></div>
<span id="Label9" style="background-color: #666666; color: white; font-family: Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif;">You are full of energy and confidence. You are unpredictable, with moods changing as quickly as an ocean. You might occasionally be calm and still, but never for long.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: 12px;">~Ada yang betul dan ada yang aku sendiri x sure. Apa-apa pun, aku buat just for fun. Kalau nak try boleh buat kat <a href="http://www.quizbox.com/personality/test82.aspx">sini</a>.</span></span></div>
HikarIhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08835599799986195450noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2752388097696545956.post-85713558766204665812012-08-07T15:24:00.001+08:002012-08-07T15:26:14.949+08:00kolej oooo kolejAssalamualaikum<br />
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Hari ni pagi2 lagi aku singgah ofis kolej KDSE dengan harapan dapat dengar berita gembira. Dengan harapan hujung minggu ni aku dapat angkut barang dari kolej lama aku KTF ke KDSE. Tapi bila pergi ofis, dia cakap kena ikut tarikh 14/8 ni. Aku cakapla aku nak balik 10/8 ni, dia cakap bilik x redi lagi. Aku da macam *@&$#&@! Sabar2, bulan puasa ni, ada baik kita belajar jadi orang yang sabar.<br />
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So dengan hati yang sebal, aku pergi lah ke fakulti. Tapi, hari ni semua benda aku buat macam x kena. Haishhh....Sabar! X pe lah, nak jadi orang yang sabar, benda2 yang menguji kesabaranla yang akan datang menjengah.<br />
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Okay, nanti pindah KDSE, jadi maknanya dalam masa dua bulan aku dah berpindah bilik sebanyak 2 kali.<br />
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Sekian terima kasih.<br />
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p/s: kitaorang x pe pindah2 ni, suka sangat. sebab x ada kerja. Simpan barang dalam kotak, pindah, keluar barang dalam kotak. pastu simpan balik barang dalam kotak, pindah, pastu keluarkan balik barang dalam kotak. Simple as it is!!!!<br />
p/s/s: Have I ever mention that I hold grudge quite a very long time? huh<br />
p/s/s/s: Sorry ter-emoHikarIhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08835599799986195450noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2752388097696545956.post-24121586477042689462012-08-02T12:31:00.001+08:002012-08-02T12:31:16.583+08:00regretAssalamualaikum<br />
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Orang cakap semua orang buat salah. Everyone deserves a second chance. Macam mana pulak you made a mistake, you got a second chance, and unfortunately, you repeat the same mistake again. Will you deserve any other chance?<br />
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P/s: Emo sket hari niHikarIhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08835599799986195450noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2752388097696545956.post-74184948569287121962012-06-09T20:31:00.000+08:002012-06-09T20:31:08.585+08:00Conference at PERSADA-Day 1Assalamualaikum~<br />
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Habis sudah minggu assessment buat pelajar postgraduate Jabatan Kimia. Minggu yang stress, memenatkan dan menakutkan, tetapi alhamdulillah, so far aku dengar semua orang okay. Memandangkan assessment dah lepas, ramailah yang pulang ke rumah, mencari ketenangan jauh dari kesibukan di UTM <strike>ayat x boley blah</strike><br />
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Tapi, aku masih berada di UTM,<strike> menghitung hari untuk pulang ke rumah which aku tak tahu bila</strike> sedang sibuk menghadirkan diri ke Conference anjuran J-Biotech di PERSADA, Johor Bharu selama 3 hari bermula hari ini.<br />
Tujuan kami join conference ini adalah untuk 'membentangkan' poster hasil kajian makmal kami.<br />
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Cukup untuk pengenalan semua as aku pun malas nak cerita panjang untuk bab tersebut. Sebenarnya sepanjang aku duduk UTM, ini first time aku pergi conference. First step poster presentation dahulu, x lama lepas ni nanti SV soh pergi oral presentation *gulp*. Biasalah, first timer, tak tahu sebenarnya nak buat apa. Sepanjang separuh hari aku berada di sana, somehow aura intellect memancar-mancar. Ada orang kenamaan, pensyarah-pensyarah yang mahir dalam bidang masing-masing. It is a good thing, berada dalam kalangan orang berilmu, akan membuatkan kita menjadi seorang yang sukakan ilmu *hopefully*.<br />
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Then, masa Lunch, memang aku cakap superb. Berbaloi bayar mahal-mahal. Makan dengan etiquette yang kita belajar masa undergraduate. You have to learn how to have proper table manner.Bila makan, terdetik dalam hati aku, macam ni lah aku nanti bila jadi lecturer. You will attend program macam ni, kena makan macam ni and so on, which is bagi aku quite scary =D<br />
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Then, petang tadi, lab partner tanya apa tujuan datang conference? Soalan tu buat aku berfikir sepanjang hari. Ye lah, apa purpose aku datang conference? Adakah semata-mata kerana SV suruh? Atau mahu menambah ilmu? Atau ingin menambah network? Dan sampai sekarang aku tak ada jawapan.<br />
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Tipulah bila aku cakap aku datang nak tambah ilmu bilamana before hari ni aku tak ada idea langsung macam mana conference dijalankan. Dalam kepala aku sebab SV suruh je....huhuhu....maunya kena siku... Jadi selepas hari ni, berusahalah untuk tukar niat tu ya *ingatan kepada diri sendiri*<br />
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Apa yang aku perhatikan, sepanjang conference ini dijalankan, kita kena tahu nak communicate dengan orang lain. Waktu macam inilah nama-nama besar dalam industri hadir, so waktu-waktu macam inilah kena belajar untuk mempromosikan diri, mengukuhkan kabel network kita. Tapi apa yang aku buat, berada di satu kelompok dan satu kelompok sepanjang-panjang hari. Entahla, I am not good at starting the conversation to begin with. I would rather stay silent all day than trying to talk to people. Hohoho. Horrible attitude. Bukan tak pernah berubah, aku pernah try tapi at the end balik kepada attitude lama~<br />
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Dan......sepanjang hari ni, aku asyik fikir, this kind of world, attending conference etc.... is this what I really wanted? hurm.....I have no answer for that question.<br />
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p/s: Counting the day to go home. Bila lah agaknya?HikarIhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08835599799986195450noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2752388097696545956.post-34792209920879771122012-05-28T00:24:00.001+08:002012-05-28T00:24:59.141+08:00mimpiAssalamualaikum<br />
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Malam tadi, lepas dah siap menulis entry yang sebelum ni, aku masuk tidur. nak dijadikan cerita, apa yang aku tulis dalam entry tu bermain balik dalam mimpi, tapi dalam versi yang lebih nasty =P</div>
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Begini kisahnya.....</div>
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Dalam mimpi aku, aku ditawarkan sambung belajar di tingkatan 6 di MRSM (wat de? MRSM ada tingkatan 6?). So dah settle semua hal, aku kena masuk kelas. Nak dijadikan cerita, hari pertama kami di sana, kitaorang dah kena marah dengan cikgu yang paling garang yang pernah aku kenal dalam seumur hidup aku. Serba-serbi yang kami buat tak kena, mesti kena marah. Tidak dapat menanggung kesusahan hidup di sana, aku mengadu pada ayah aku yang kebetulan masih lagi berada di situ (errr, x balik rumah gamaknya). Aku ingat apa yang aku bagitahu pada ayah aku, "Abah, kakak dah tak sanggup nak duduk sini. Boleh tak kakak nak balik rumah?" sambil menangis. LOL</div>
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Then mimpi aku aku melompat. Aku berada di kawasan rumah kami di PD. Nak dijadikan cerita, aku dengan seorang wanita yang aku tak kenali menaiki sebuah motorsikal, sedang meneliti paip air di kawasan perumahan tersebut. Lepas satu-satu kami check. Rupa-rupanya kami dikehendaki mencari kod untuk deactivate bomb. LOL. Ala-ala Running Man gitu. Setiap mission ada masa yang diberikan. Dan, kesudahannya kami gagal mencari kod yang diberikan. Tiba-tiba ada seorang lelaki dengan sniper (aura orang jahat) datang ke arah kami lalu menembak kami, tetapi satu tembakan pun tidak mengena. Namun, bangunan di kawasan perumahan kami musnah ditembak oleh sniper (errrkkkkk).</div>
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Sampai situ sahaja aku ingat mimpi aku.</div>
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Bila aku fikir balik, somehow aku rasa mimpi aku macam meluahkan apa yang benar-benar apa yang aku rasa sekarang. Hohoho. If you can catch the meaning la......Tapi walau apa pun, I wont stop now! I want to finish what I started, so please pray for me.</div>
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p/s: Baru lepas gayut ngan Kak Cik, she cried.....Membuatkan aku ingin pulang ke rumah sekarang! I WANT TO GO HOME!!!!HikarIhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08835599799986195450noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2752388097696545956.post-64675923714855363962012-05-27T01:26:00.003+08:002012-05-27T01:26:51.494+08:00suara hati seorang anak dan kakakAssalamualaikum<br />
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Sambil menulis entry ni, sambil dengar lagu Tohoshinki 'Bright'. Walaupun lagu ni dalam Japanese, rasa sayu tetap terasa *ada kaitan?*</div>
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Hari ni, adik perempuan aku Kak Cik, Mama dengan Abah akan bertolak ke Sarawak untuk pendaftaran kak cik ke UNIMAS. Alhamdulillah, dia dapat buat asasi selama setahun di sana. Sudah tentu, orang yang paling gembira ialah parents kami. Teringat masa aku called abah untuk inform pasal kemasukan ke UNIMAS, bukan main gembira lagi suara abah. Hohoho. Alhamdulillah. Terima kasih Allah atas rahmat ini.</div>
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Bila difikirkan balik, antara 8 adik-beradik, kak cik selalu dapat tempat yang aku namakan sebagai "PELIK". Pelik bukanla WEIRD tapi pelik dari segi tempat dia ditawarkan belajar. Contohnya selepas UPSR, dengan result dia, alhamdulillah dia ditawarkan belajar di sekolah berasrama penuh (SBP). Tetapi yang dahsyatnya, dia dapat di Pekan, Pahang. Pada waktu itu kami sekeluarga menetap di Kelantan, aku dan 2 adik lelaki aku belajar di Terengganu. Nampak tak betapa jauhnya dia kena merantau.</div>
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Kemudian, kak di (muda dua tahun dari kak cik) dapat tawaran naik tingkatan 1 ke MRSM Terendak, Melaka, ketika itu, kami dalam proses berpindah ke Posrt Dickson, Negeri Sembilan. Manakala aku tercampak ke Johor, dua adik lelaki aku dapat sambung belajar di KL. Jadi bila family aku berpindah ke PD kita dapat lihat family aku 'berpusat' di pantai barat (kecuali aku yang jauh ke selatan). Tetapi, kak cik tetap setia di Pekan sehingga ke tingkatan 5. Maka berulang-alikla kami sekeluarga dari Kuala Lumpur ke Melaka ke Port Dickson ke Pekan ke Terengganu and vice versa.</div>
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Dan bermula esok, kak cik akan mendaftar di UNIMAS, Sarawak sebagai pelajar asasi selama setahun. Maka di sini aku simpulkan sekali lagi bahawasanya kak cik tercampak jauh ke Sarawak, sedangkan kami masih di pantai barat =P </div>
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Pada aku, memang agak pelik dia dapat di Sarawak, no one expect she is gonna live there. Aku honestly nak adik aku dapat di Johor, sama-sama tercampak dengan aku. Tapi rezeki dia di sana, siapalah kita nak menolak kan? huhuhu.....</div>
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Tapi sayang, hari ni kesemua adik-beradik aku except aku sebagai anak sulung menghantar kak cik ke airport. Sedih tau tak? Dahla tengah tension dengan assessment yang akan datang (aku ada 3 presentation dalam masa dua minggu). Nak tak nak, aku menahan diri dari balik ke rumah minggu ini sehingga dua minggu lagi. Sedih sangat, sebab next time bila aku balik rumah, tinggal adik bongsu aku je. Takkan nak main dengan dia? Sebenarnya boleh je, tapi homework dia lebih diutamakan daripada keinginan seorang kakak yang mahu bermain dengan adik-adiknya. LOL. Bila kira-kira, kitaorang lapan beradik dapat berkumpul ramai-ramai semula bila nak dekat raya which is two months away! Tu aje! Sedih betul.</div>
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Kalau ikutkan, aku sebenarnya tak berapa setuju dengan sistem semester break yang baru ni (walaupun aku students research, i still have my semester break okay ;P). Mana taknya, kalau dulu, budak-budak sekolah cuti, budak universiti mesti cuti. Kalau ikutkan sistem lama, sekarang ni kitaorang da start cuti taw! Tapi sejak pakai sistem baru ni, cuti kitaorang start bulan 6 ni. Tu pun tengah-tengah di mana cuti sekolah dah pun berakhir. Habis, masa bila kitaorang boleh berkumpul sekeluarga? *selfish* indeed I am! Emo sebab tak dapat balik. Rasanya kalau pakai sistem lama, kitaorang nyer assessment dah lama lepas!? *im not blaming the assessment, in fact im blaming the pertukaran sistem semester break* Let me be honest, I hate it! Selalu sangat tak dapat balik bila dorang semua berkumpul di rumah.</div>
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Tapi asyik kalau-kalau, it wont gonna change anything, right? Aku tak faham kenapa sistem semester break ni kena ubah. Apa masalah pakai sistem lama? Siapa-siapa yang tahu silalah share ye because I honestly dont know about it.</div>
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Dahla, malas da nak tulis panjang-panjang. Introduction proposal aku pun tak panjang macam ni. tulis panjang-panjang banyak lagi ketidakpuashatian aku pada sistem baru ni. grrrrr.....</div>
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Dear kak cik,</div>
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Tahniah dapat masuk UNIMAS. Make sure hargai peluang yang ada, dan buat yang terbaik. Jaga diri sepanjang berada di Sarawak, jangan lupa solat, jangan lupa untuk selalu kol mama dengan abah, dan yang penting, bawak balik khazanah sarawak ye. Gurau je! Kakak doakan you berjaya dunia dan akhirat, be a good daughter untuk mama dan abah, dan tunjukkan bahawa berada di Sarawak tidak menghalang kak cik dari selalu balik rumah....kekekekeke.....Next time kakak balik rumah, Im gonna miss moments kita tengok Running Man sama-sama, gelak jahat sesama, dan kakak akan rindukan masa mengarah kak cik buat kerja rumah. Now I have to do it alone !______! selalulah balik "Malaysia" ea.</div>
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p/s: Ada budak tu excited dapat fly "oversea". Ye lah, over the sea!<br />
p/s/s: Hitori jyanai !______!<br />
p/s/s/s: can I cry now?HikarIhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08835599799986195450noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2752388097696545956.post-19313888061710644622012-04-03T15:18:00.000+08:002012-04-03T15:18:54.710+08:00matta aimashou^^special for you~<br />
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Ikitaiiyo kimi no soba ni<br />
chiisakutemo chiisakutemo<br />
ichiban ni kimi ga suki dayou<br />
tsuyoku irareru~<br />
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Lyrics from Otsuka Ai's Planetarium =DHikarIhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08835599799986195450noreply@blogger.com0